Haunted College

This is the city where my college is and apparently the dorms are haunted too. Wow, they really meant it when they said SCAD was like Hogwarts

Roommate day: so far, its torture

So today is the day we find out who our roommates are.... and they hve yet to send out the e-mails. So I'm sitting here thinking of all the awful possibilities I could end up with and this is what I've got so far:

• Doesn't have a facebook- yes i know this sounds silly but I'm ready to start talking about room plans, like, NOW. And I really don't want to have to search all over facebook just to find out that she doesn't have one and furthermore, that i have no way to contact her and discuss these plans. 
• That she will hate me- This is not hard to do. I'm not the nicest person in the world, especially if I feel my personal space is invaded and a dorm room, well, has no personal space. Plus, when I get really excited about something I kind of start to make all these plans and have all these ideas and I'm kind of worried I might bombard her with all of these plans or (accidentally) make her feel like her opinion doesn't matter. I would HATE for this to happen!
• That I will hate HER- I'm a pretty particular person and I'm really used to having my own space, my sleep un-interrupted, and only my own mess to clean. Oh, and my own closet. I'm REALLY used to that (I actually have two closets: one fairly small closet for all the current clothes of the season and one very large walk in closet above the previous closet, there is a ladder leading from one to the other, for the clothes of last season, special occasions, costumes, and repairs). And some of these changes are going to be difficult for me to swallow... particularly the sharing of the closet part.  And the sleeping part, yeah, I pity anyone who tries to wake me up too soon. I'm sort of scary.... OK, I'm a friggin' monster! But i'm also willing to compromise and discuss and work out any issues we may have. 
• That some of my things will just randomly... go missing- I typically would never suspect anyone of stealing. Its just not something I usually think about.... until I read all these awful roommate horror stories! Now, I still highly doubt anyone from this amazing art school would do anything like that. But still, a lot of the things I own have a lot of emotional attachment, like my grandfather's sweater, my grandmother's rings, the dress I got in Thailand, and theft is just such an awful thing not just for someone to do, but to accuse someone of doing. And I NEVER want to have to deal with that. 
• That my roommate and I will have no connection- I completely understand if we aren't best friends or anything or even if we just don't hang out. That's totally cool with me and I won't take it personally, but I would like to enjoy coming back to the dorm and see this person there. Hell, I would love to be good friend's with my roommate just like I was with mine at WashU Portfolio Plus. But at the very least, I don't want to feel like I'm coming home to some stranger I just happen to share a room with. 
• That my roommate will like me too much- Sounds silly right? Well, if you think about it, its really not. do I want to be friends with my roommate? Yes. Would I like to be close friends with my roommate? Hell, yeah! Do I want my roommate to follow me around all the time and make me feel bad because I didn't include her in one stupid thing that she wasn't even interested in? Hell to the no!
• That she won't tell me when there is a problem- I really want to get along with my roommate. And a lot of that involves communication. Future roommate: if there is any sort of problem, even if its small and stupid, please tell me. I sincerely want you to like me and I am willing to reasonably compromise to make that happen. And I can't fix a problem if I don't know that there is one
• That I will get one of the haunted dorms- I know, this also sounds silly but seriously, look at this site! It has all the SCAD dorms and the hauntings. Apparently SCAD and the RA's take it really seriously too. http://haunted_scad.tripod.com/ 
• That I will get stuck with the prude who cant even change clothes in front of me-I mean, geez, We're both adults here and the girl who hides in the closet or bathroom to change just makes things even more awkward. Or that she will hate me because I dont go to church. I'm from Texas, a very deep red state, so I'm kind of an anomalous and I've actually lost friends because I dont go to church, or i don't go to THEIR church, or because of my political beliefs. To me, that stuff is deeply personal and should never be a reason to stop being friends with someone, or worse, treat them like crap. I'm pretty accepting of all walks of life, religious, non religious, saints, sinners. And I would hope that my roommate would be too. 
• That she will encourage me to eat shitty food. - I really dont need that right now
• That I will have to wait forever to find out who my roommate is!!!!! COME ON SCAD!!!! 

Finding a Nutritional Dominatrix

So after looking around my town for possible diet options (nutritionists, diet programs, stuff like that) I realized that just about every other place had some sort of gimmick that I had no interest in, like drugs and massive amounts of expensive supplements. When my mother realized "Oh hey! You have a 24 hour membership! I'm going to call them and see what they say." She made an Appointment with this muscly guy who pretty much just asked me what my goals were and things along that line and he directed me to one of his trainers/nutrionists. I had an appointment set up as soon as possible, attended said appointment and was pleasantly surprised. The nutrition plan she had made was very doable... even enjoyable. I got introduced into muscle milk as a night time snack/chocolate fix.... and my GOD was it good!!! I was actually very sad when it was gone. She incorporated things that i liked and ate often like my turkey and cheese sandwich from which which (which I always cut and half and save the rest for later) and my love for berries and broccoli. I now eat 6 times a day at specific times (way more often than I'm used to eating) 3 hours apart and have an APEX account and she has promised that I will not be able to get away with anything, so I will now be micromanaged by a nutritional fitness dominatix. And that is exactly what I needed.
I now also have to go to the gym EVERY SINGLE DAY and if i miss a day, I have to double up. And I am now upping my work out schedule so that on days that I bellydance I am also going for a run or gettting at least 30 min of hard cardio. I am also logging EVERYTHING. even a bite of celery and at what time. Hoping to get the body bugg, a little device that tracks the amount of calories you have burned, but its pretty expensive. I may just have to dip into my graduation money but god knows I'm incredibly stingy with money once it goes into saving. In fact, I've never taken money out of my savings before.
I have also just discovered that the power crunch bars I get to have for my afternoon snack can be ordered online with FREE shipping! That makes life for the poor college student with out a car significantly easier.
for now i am having my morning snack because, according to my summer sleep schedule, 2:30pm. is still morning to my body. its quite delicious actually. Plain nonfat greek yogurt with stevia, 2 mango slices and a pinch of almonds. Surprisingly filling. I have not yet gotten the power crunch bars or the Apex whey drink mix (they didnt have it at costco). but that is on my schedule today. Now if only I could actually get myself to start that dang apex account!

The Semper Fi GF

I have recently been informed that my boyfriend is pursuing the marines. My initial reaction, of course, was bad. I really did not want him to do it but I told him that I wasn't going stop him because he would never stop me from pursuing what I wanted to do with my life. None the less, I was (not) secretly delighted when he told me that the marines would not take him because of the many broken bones he acquired from BMX sports. Thank GOD for a boy's recklessness!!! He woke me up the next morning (with a phone call) to tell me that the marines will take him after all (shit!) as long as he does well enough on the test and he will only be able to take a desk job (oh thank god!). And I decided: I can handle that. So He has been studying his butt off. My only concern now is the distance apart and the time we will spend away, which would have been inevitable since I'm already leaving for Georgia in a little over a month. and who knows? Maybe he will even be stationed closer to me. But still, I cant help but be a little ill at ease with that situation.
But eventually I put those thoughts of worry aside and actually thought about what I thought was going to happen or change and I realized: not much. Just because he's in anther city does not make me less crazy about him. We wouldn't have been in the same city anyways. At least this way we can both spend the next four years preparing to do what we want to do with our lives and become who we always wanted to be. Could things fall apart? Yes. But I honestly don't feel that it will. At least not any time soon. I was reminded of something that I had heard in the Sex in the City 2 movie (I'm still obsessed with this show. I'm sure I've seen them all multiple times). Carrie's butler, when asked about his relationship with his distant wife, said  “When we see each other time doesn’t matter. Each time we see each other, it’s wonderful” And isn't that what really matters? Its not the amount of time you spend together but the quality of time and the quality of the person you are spending time with. I gotta say, I see him every few days and each day is wonderful no matter what we are doing. Hell, I dont even need an hour with him to cheer me up for a week.
 On the car ride to the mall with my mom says "its a shame you two can't be together. I like him more and more everyday" "yeah he kinda grows on you like that. And what do you mean?" "Well, you're not going t be in the same cities anymore and probably not even in the same state" "so?" 
I'm sure many of you reading this must think I'm in some crazy fairy tale land and maybe I am. But I assure you, I'm looking at this as realistically as possible. First of all: I have amazing flight benefits so as long as he remains in the U.S. (as he probably will) I can visit him for nearly nothing. Second of all: he gets great benefits! And makes a good bit of money too. Third: once he is out of the service getting a good job will be as easy as pie. Fourth: the dress blues are sexy. And it is very respectable and I would be insanely proud of him. Fifth: Um, I'm going to be in college. I'm going to be working my ass off in the name of art and Fashion. And when I'm not working my ass off there, I will be working my ass off... at the gym. Or, of course, I will be making friends and having a good time. And I've always wanted to write a letter to a man in the military. I guess I could start with my own man. Does anyone know what the program is? The one that gives you a soldier to write letter to? If anyone ever finds out let me know. "
So in other words, I'm no longer worried. If it works out, great. If not, well, I'm still awful proud to know him.

But yeah, I've had this one song stuck in my head all day and I have to post it. I think its just too perfect.

Peacock dance!!!!!

ok, so I'm aware that this is completely random but I have a fascination with peacocks. The dance gets kinda boring after a minute but still, what a beautiful bird!

Back to Black

Amy Winehouse was found dead yesterday morning in her apartment.
My reaction: GOD DAMN IT!!!
In all honesty, I kinda saw it coming as I'm sure we all did. But somehow her death still stroke quite a chord on my heart strings. Surprisingly, it was actually my mom (I'm sure you are tired of hearing about her) who introduced me to Winehouse's music on a road trip to Detroit. By the end of the first day (its a two day trip from my hometown in Texas to my mother's hometown in Michigan) we were singing every song on her Back to Black album. My two favorite songs were always "Black to Black" and "Tears dry on their own" and I considered them to be my best break up songs. They got me through a lot shitty relationships and reminded that I was a bad ass and did not need "stupid men" and that even so, it was ok to still cry and feel passionately (obviously i never really paid much attention to the drug references). She was also the only singer I could confidently sing to and sort of emulate in the car or shower and some of the only songs that I would sing if I were ever forced to sing karaoke. I had always lumped her with greats such as Aretha Franklin, and Whitney Houston and yet she had this rare, wonderful nitty gritty feeling that was bad ass, ugly and sexy. I fear that we will never hear another singer like her in this shamefully pathetic music industry where people settle for only things with "a great dance beat" or the shit that gets stuck in you head like Rebecca Black's "Friday" or just the shit thats just shitty and shallow and emotionless. And what really drives me crazy is that the populace eats it up like its honey and forget about the people who actually HAVE talent! But I will stop there as to not go off on some crazy rant.
Back to my point: I miss Amy Winehouse. I miss her music. I miss her smokey, sexy feel and her bad ass confidence. I miss the way she dressed with its loose, dirty sex appeal. And above all, I miss her talent. Unfortunately, I have a very busy day ahead of me so I will not be able to make this post as long as I would have liked so I will leave you with one of my favorites of hers and a link to a fantastic photo shoot that pays homage to her tough sultry style.

http://www.stylecaster.com/fashion/14294/remembering-amy-winehouse-muse-musical-legend#136128

Rest in Peace Amy. And worry not, for our tears will also dry on our own. 

The Serene Tsunami and My Love: A Dream

So I know this has nothing to do with my blog... at all. But it was just so odd I had to share it. I apologize for not editing, it is very early in the morning. Here is my dream:

I am in some sort of youth hostel in a coastal European city. With me are my boyfriend, Tarryn (one of my longest friends) and some of her friends as well as a few of my acquaintances and some random people I didn't know. We were having quite a lovely time. We had smushed all of our twin beds together so that we could be close to each other. The sheets were white and we were near a large window probably on the 4^th or 5^th floor. Maybe even the third but my point is we are just above some of the nearby houses which are all made out of stone and look like they have been there for forever and there are definitely a few floor above us. Someone looks out at the coast from the window at the other side of the room and says that there was a tsunami coming and we had to prepare quick! There was a moment where everyone seemed like they weren’t sure what we should do but then it seemed like people just suddenly knew what we needed to do. We had brought these sort of scuba diving masks looking things but they didn’t need to be attached to a tank. They just took the oxygen from the water. Other people who weren’t as prepared or fortunate just covered their mouths with cups and reused their own air. We layed down on the beds (no where else to go except for maybe the bathroom or hallway) and coverd ourselves with a big white sheet I look over to my right and there’s my boyfriend. He holds my hand firmly as the wave came and enveloped us almost like we were just at the beach laying in the sand and the water just rushing up our bodies. I didn’t feel fear although I was a little anxious but I felt like everything was going to be fine. Tarryn seemed just as placid. The water filled the room and I just focused on breathing and my boyfriend's hand in mine. The water was a dark inky blue grey and it filled the room but I felt that I could see clearly. There was a little bit of a feeling of vertigo but it wasn’t unpleasant. My boyfriend's hand stayed in mine. And as quick as it came the water went back to the ocean leaving our room. I had my eyes closed but I remember feeling like I was slowly, carefully falling almost like we were gently being put back to bed. I open my eyes after the water is gone and sit up and look at my boyfriend. He just has that sweet yet cocky grin he always has as he smiles at me and holds my forearm. I look out the window and see how green everything is. There are tree limbs and debris all over the place and some places still look marshy and wet but the overall feeling is very green and full of trees. I look up to find that the floors above us are gone and instead there is a tree top covering the majority of the “roof” I notice how on one side the leaves are going from green to yellow to red. And I think its pretty. I look out the window again and say something about the older watermarks on the stone houses and another girl starts talking about a time she once traveled to a castle and looked down at the watermarks and the news people caught her and put it on tv. And then everyone just swaps travel and history stories and I wake up. 

Its so weird. I would certainly be interesting to hear someone's dream interpretation of that, not that i necessarily believe in such things. Now that I look back on it, it kind of reminds me of the song "At the Bottom of Everything" by Bright eyes (if you haven't heard it before you should really look it up... or i might post it. I love this song). Anyways, thats what I have to say on this lovely, obnoxiously early morning. Let me know of you at least found this interesting or if you happen to have a theory on the ryme or reason for this dream. Crazy and possibly "stupid answers are always welcome.
Oh! and good morning! Hope you are enjoying your coffee because I sure need some.
and yes there is supposed to be talking at the begining. its kind if important but of it bothers you just skip a min.